The Facebook: Decoded

Someone on the Pickup Podcast forums posted a thread about Facebook game asking if it’s a game killer. I decided to blog about it in terms of Pickup. I am no expert on this but I have had it for a while and have knowledge of it and a couple of cool things I will share.

Is Facebook a game killer? It can be.

Can it boost your game? Absolutely.

I have a natural friend (although I'm beginning to think he knows about game) that says hi to tons of people in real life and then gets them on Facebook and asks them if they're going 'whatever club on fri, me and x are goin xxx'. Short and sweet. He has over 1000 friends on there and I actually believe that's how many he has in real life because I've never seen anything like it, the guy is only like 17. He goes to a lot of clubs and stuff. It's great to have him as a friend. He doesn’t really give a shit and it’s like how the fuck does he know all these people. Anyway my point is that he has lots of Facebook friends and seems to be gaming several girls.

You should know a bit about Facebook game as a super PUAAAH hero (or potential).

Firstly, don't get a huge ass profile like I did because it shows you spend way too much time online (I do, because I like it. It's not attractive though). I know a girl who'd be considered hot but she's always on updating her status every 15 minutes. You can remove these silly boxes like “tell me what you honestly think of me. Your hottest friends” and stuff like that. You can have your own privacy on Facebook believe it or not.

THE WALL

Some girls will flirt with you over the wall but remember everyone can see that so you might wanna use the message feature instead. Respect her privacy. Calibrate to what kind of girl she is.

Just be wise about what you want people to see and what you don't want people to see.

People have been fired from their jobs because their employer found out they were partying instead of being sick or whatever.

Fuck other guys, they'll probably blow themselves out. What's cool about it is you can see how they talk to her (Wall-to-Wall... Unless the guy has private) and how she responds. Obviously the better your real interaction then the better response you'll get if she writes back.

There's no 100% rule for each situation but don't message her back 2 seconds after she's messaged you. Don't write on her wall if she's sent you a personal message. Being too available, even if you are… Is not attractive.

P.S. Don't use the funwall application it's stupid.

FRIENDS

Obvious social proof. Add all the friends you have and make lots of friends. Don't be afraid to add people. Fuck the ones who act weird or ignore you. Some of them don't check emails or just forget about Facebook. Tonight I was wondering whether to add this girl or not who I'd briefly bantered with on a night out. It was like 5 minutes or something and nothing really solid. I saw her on some event thing so I added her and she messaged me on my wall and we bantered some more and she's asking the interest questions... I couldn't yet bring myself to use Tyler’s 'trust comfort n connection' but probably should. I'll answer her tomorrow. Anyways... other girls on my list will see this.

I have added girls who I never spoke to at school but now it's over it like it's ok to speak because we have that commonality, weird but just how it goes. I was very different back then so probably a good thing.

This is one where a girl who used to go our school, she's a year or two younger (I'm nearly 20). Ok so I joined a group this girl set up, had around 15 people in it and I put my 2cents in the comment about the group and she sent out a mass message thanking people for joining. I didn't bother responding back. I don't remember how but she ended up adding me, I am a good bud with this guy who's her friend. We spoke a bit. Maybe it's lack of experience or they're just nice, you know this because they'll respond to each bit of your reply, may be lengthy responses, laugh at little things and message you back all the time. Here you know you could probably hang out with her and see what she's like if you aren't on very familiar terms. For this I'd use the message thing so she knows you have privacy or respect hers. Also hanging out is better than date or anything because the word 'date' causes the mind to jump to expectations and anxiety and it will probably make things weird no matter what her decision.

PHOTOS

She needs more proof? HERE. Photos are the best way. You can have a lot of friends but are they real or what. Get a big picture or where it's easy to notice you. Upload lots of pictures. Put your good looking/sp pictures on your profile. You can use the 'big pictures' application to get big pictures so girls who will visit your profile can't not see you with other girls. Gets them wondering, who is that girl etc. I don't think some girls like being tagged in photos because the rest of their friends see them, guys start asking about it "whos that", "is that your bf" and "looks like your having fun" even if he wasn't at the venue or brings it up later in a conversation with her LOL. So don't tag them. If it's after a nightout and they were climbing all over you in a pic then they will usually say they were drunk, which may be true :). The forgetfulness seems to be very common as well, it must be all that drinking. :P

I personally love collecting the pics just as a reminder of old times, it's great to just look through them and be like wow remember that.

EVENTS

It's just an easy way of organising events and stuff. A person who's comfortable meeting you in person may not be comfortable on the phone so Facebook might be better for them. Girls who are friends of yours can see the events you go to which is a positive (unless she's psycho :D).

MISC

You can do little things like instead of using the short version of your name, use the long version. Why, because nobody really does that. I use for example: "Travis G. Bickle" -- 'course that's not my real name but just tiny stuff like that seperates you.

I'm no expert or anything on this either. I get good responses from it when I see the girls in real life. It helps them see positive aspects of your life which are attractive. The same way you would wanna know more about a girl. She may be stunning on the surface but a total trainwreck.

Some random tips:

1. asking her if she's on facebook may be a bit direct, a lot of girls wont mind and they'll be cool with it. another way could be bringing it up in conversation jokingly with your friends... Accomplishment intro - "this guys a pimp, he's got 1000 friends on Facebook". If she has it she'll probably ask depending on how long you've been talking and how good the interaction is going.

2. don't just ask "do you have facebook", I made this mistake. Say "I'll add you on facebook". It's like "who are you" instead of "what's your name".

3. if you do just ask her if she has facebook...

cool, "who are ya, whats ya second name". Then remember it. If it's a weird name say "hopefully I'll be able to spell it" or "ok cool, I'll try remember that".

bust on her for not having it. "no facebook? omg we're in 2008 here missy". Calibrate, be congruent and playful with it.

cut thread and talk about something else. You could just say "facebook.com" as if she should know. She may be congruence-testing to see if you'll explain it all to her and start qualifying yourself.

If there's anything I've missed that I feel I can speak on then give me a shout.

Appreciate it.

Travis